Tuesday, January 3, 2006

I want to be a switch-hitter

A post from mysteria reminded me of something that had crossed my mind last night while watching the latest Star Trek, the Last Generation movie on TV. You know those Vulcans, who aren't supposed to have emotion... Well, some things that I should be doing have been a lot on my mind, lately. Looking for a part-time job is one of them. Working on my writing ideas is another. There's more. I'm sure you have some, too.

A lot of dark thinking gets in the way of accomplishing those things. Self-doubt, frustration, insecurity. Reluctance. Laziness. And I thought, wouldn't it be handy if we could simply turn off those negative emotions, and get done the stuff that needs to get done? Just flip a switch and all those nasty little emotions that we (all) allow to get in our way, at one time or another, no longer would be a hindrance...

Ahh. Wouldn't that be sweet?

But as I thought about it longer, would that device hinder our personal growth? Would it stunt our ability to get through the tough stuff? To buck up and dance to the music, even if it's our least-favorite tune?

Or would it bolster our confidence? "Whew, glad to get that out of the way." "That wasn't as bad as I thought it would be!" "Hey, I CAN do that, after all!" "Look at me, I'm flying!" And then next time we encounter a diffcult situation, we won't need to flip the switch, at all.

Maybe I can work on creating my own internal switch. The Don't-Think-About-It-Just-Do-It toggle. I'd get a lot more done that way, and I might even get some brownie points with the character-development people upstairs, or out there, or wherever they float around.

Do you have your own internal switch? What does yours do?

Sunday, January 1, 2006

Returning from the Land of Nog

After having vanished from the cyber-ether for nearly a month, I've returned, for the time being, from the Land of Nog. I hope your holidays were warm and joyful. After a rocky start, mine managed to settle into a relaxed rhythm that I'm sorry to leave behind today. My husband was home for eleven days, and after the initial Day of Decompression, things were very pleasant around here. Wish it could be so more often. I was sorry to see him leave for work this morning, because it meant returning to the Daily Grind and the usual stresses that make life difficult.

Our Christmas was pleasant. I made two Christmas dinners, one for us, and one for my in-laws a couple days later. We chose not to celebrate with them and my sister-in-law's family this year, because money is tight, and it seemed illogical for us to stress out about buying presents for five extra people we only see and hear from at my sister-in-law's Christmas gatherings. It also seemed unfair to impose present-buying on her parents and grandparents for our family for the same reason.

So, it was two turkeys for us, two batches of stuffing and mashed potatoes, and two pumpkin pies, and it occured to me to wonder, not for the first time, why are the Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners the same? I wanted to cook a ham for us, but my American friend from across the valley had sick children to contend with, in addition to her own celebrations to prepare for, so she didn't have the time or energy to escort me into the Commissary at Patch Barracks so I could get me some ham.

Germans, while big on pork, don't do ham. Which is really too bad.

I did make egg nog for the first time. After a little research, I found a recipe that involved only four eggs, a reduced amount of whipping cream, and while the egg whites got whipped to a frothy consistency and added raw to the mixture at the very end, the egg yolks, at least, were cooked during the initial process. Unfortunately, I have a weird allergy to raw eggs, and even the egg yolks caused a reaction. I had two cups of the stuff, plus a little glass with rum added, and ended up pouring the rest of the batch down the sink. It tasted good, but was mighty rich.

I think next time, I'll use less whipping cream, low-fat milk instead of whole, and nix the beaten-to-a-froth egg whites altogether.

We did not celebrate the holidays with my Dread Mother-in-Law, much to my intense relief. She's stuck in Greece, her homeland, watching after her elderly mother, who is stricken with Alzheimer's.

At least, I thought she was stuck in Greece for a good long time, until I learned that she will, indeed, be staying with us for a lengthy visit beginning January 14. She is a BEAST, and a spy, and a downright piece of work to experience. Chances are excellent that I won't be logging onto Blogit for the the duration of her visit. I've said repeatedly to my husband, How on earth does she think she's going to stay here for six weeks??? We can't have peace in the house for even a single day, when she's here!

So, we'll see where that potentially traumatic time will take us.

She thought she might bring her mother with, Alzheimer's and all, but when she called yesterday, I think I overheard that she'll be leaving the Greek über-matron at home.

I'm sorry to sound so unsympathetic about her and her mother. I just cannot convey the horror that this woman is. I was dreading having to listen to muttered insults about me in two languages, but it looks like I'll only have to endure it from a single source, in a single language.
My mother-in-law wouldn't mutter insulting things about me in Greek. No. She'd do it so I could understand it. Very considerate of her, don't you think?

Do I sound stressed out, already? How perceptive!

On the by-the-way side of things, remember when I mentioned being interviewed by a reporter from my hometown newspaper? Well, it came out shortly before Christmas, and my parents sent me a copy of it. What follows is the copy, only slightly edited for obvious reasons.
The author of the article wasn't very precise about quoting me ("I'm pretty sure I didn't say that quite like that..." ), but the article itself was nice, and sensitively written.

December 22, 2005
By A Writer from Silver’s Rural Village

When SilverMoon7 , formerly of our small town, decided to follow her heart, she didn't think she would end up half-way around the world. And she certainly didn't anticipate a long distance relationship ... with the life she used to know.

That's exactly what happened when Silver and her husband moved to Stuttgart, Germany, six years ago.

Silver’s dad and Silver’s mom of our small town said that when their daughter first announced the move to Silver’s hubby's native land, everyone was happy.

"It was exciting at first, I thought what an opportunity to move overseas and travel," Silver’s mom said. "But then she actually went and it was really difficult for me to adjust."

Although she still struggles with her daughter living far away, she said it was hardest the first year, when she would weep just thinking of her departure.

"I just missed her so much and then she got pregnant and it was exciting, but hard again," Silver’s mom said. "Fortunately we have a good phone plan, so we talk and e-mail a lot."

And with the addition of her new grandson, Alex, who is now 5, Silver’s mom said they have also become savvy with digital photos.

Although both families try to make the overseas trip once, maybe twice a year, Silver’s mom said it's still difficult to spend quality time together.

"There is a seven-hour time difference, so when we can visit we are seriously jet lagged," Silver’s mom said. "We want to be awake when they are sleeping and they are awake when we are sleeping."

Silver said she too struggles with the time and distance constraints. But she said she never anticipated this when her initial decision was made out of love and not with the "what ifs."

"I thought it (moving to Germany) was for good, but I knew there was a possibility for us to come back," Silver said. "Things happened very quickly. I had to quit my job and learn a new language, my life changed overnight," Silver said. "I was very independent and went from being someone who knew where I was going to being a foreigner, learning a foreign language and pregnant."

Although she said things are getting easier, she feels like she always will have to cope on some level with her new lifestyle.

"I knew it would be hard and I thought it would be a good thing," Silver said. "But it's going on six years and it's still difficult. I still get homesick and I still have some difficulty with the language."

If that weren't enough she said she is still treated differently by her neighbors.

"After this many years here, I still feel like a foreigner," Silver said. "And people tend to treat foreigners as if they have never experienced anything in their life, like suggesting that I get a winter coat because (German) winters are cold. Of course they are, I know that because I come from Chicago and (German) winters are actually more mild (than in Chicago)."

She said she is also left with a general impression that Germans think Americans are annoying.

"Based on their comedy skits, they show us as fast talkers, or obnoxious," Silver said.
She said that is a general perception that is hardly ever perceived on a personal level. In dealing one-on-one with German people, she said she is greeted with a warmer view of America.

"Most of the people I have met are very interested in me as an American," Silver said. "I hear a lot of 'I love America' or 'I've always wanted to go', and that's nice, especially when you hear all the anti-American sentiments (on TV)."

Aside from her treatment as a foreigner and mixed signals for her nationality, she said there are many other anomalies that also have surprised her about her home.

"The drivers here are more aggressive, even than in Chicago," Silver said. "Driving on the autobahn [the expressways in Germany] is very fast and in some stretches there isn't even a speed limit. You hear about a lot of accidents all the time on there."

She said she also was pleasantly surprised by the lack of skyscrapers and the unusually high numbers of pedestrians in Stuttgart.

Of course there are many other things she said she likes about Germany and was quick to point out their medical benefits.

"When I was pregnant I didn't pay for any prescriptions and when I gave birth we didn't have to pay for anything," Silver said. "But the social system is starting to break down, so I think things will change."

Along with excellent medical care she said she really enjoys the country's landscape. She said there are lots of trees and some of the attractive sitelines don't get turned into parking lots.

"They are very stingy with their land and there are a ton of forest preserves," she said.

Currently she said she is living with her family in Wildberg, next to the Black Forest, which she said is connected by forest all the way to Switzerland.

"Preservation here is amazing, south Germany is stunning," Silver said. "It's really a shame when you compare it to the U.S."

Despite the wooded view, she said she still misses living in the U.S., and if there is one thing Germany doesn't do well it's the pizza.

"The pizza here is made with gouda cheese (not mozzarella)," Silver said. "If you want mozzarella you have to specify and they only give you a little. It's (the mozzarella) different too, it's fresher, not aged and it comes in a ball that is in a bag of water. It's just not the same."

Even though she can't comfort herself with the taste of home, she said it's a comparable treat to run into someone who speaks English.

"When I hear someone speaking English, it's music to my ears because I really don't hear it that often," Silver said. "If I hear it, I always make a point to speak to that person."

In addition to a couple from New Jersey, she said she has met a near-area resident while in Germany.

"One time on the train I saw a girl with a very unique appearance sitting a few seats away," Silver explained. "I was talking to my son (in English) and she asked me, in a very mid-western and familiar way, where I was from. It was a nice surprise and a friendly outreach that I needed at that time."

She said although her life abroad is generally happy, she would ask her husband to move to the states if she could do it all over again.

"But I'm one of those people that thinks things happen for a reason," Silver said. "I have grown a lot in the past six years and have had a really unique experience, one that not everybody gets a chance to experience."

Actually, the pizza isn't bad, it's just different. It's really very tasty, though the gouda cheese makes it saltier, and comes with a much greater variety of toppings than commonly available Stateside. You can't get Italian sausage, though. Pepperoni is called Salami, and jalapeno peppers are called pepperoni, which catches me unawares, on occasion, to this day.

So, on the topic of Pizza, at pizza delivery places, there is not only pizza and Italian dishes on the menu, but Indian, Chinese, Mexican, as well. The Mexican is modified, and not quite as we know it in the US. And anything preceded by the word Amerkanisch, usually isn't. At least not according to my experience. Living 30 years on the outskirts of Chicago, I think I have a pretty good idea of what goes into a traditional pizza and Mexicana dish. And baby, that just ain't it...

But it's all good, anyway!

I hope your holidays were good ones. I'll see y'all around.